warningEMERGENCY BROADCAST SYSTEM: UNPRECEDENTED SALT LEVELS DETECTEDwarningCRITICAL COPIUM SHORTAGE REPORTED ACROSS THE FANBASE CORRIDORwarningCATEGORY 5 MELTDOWN ADVISORY IN EFFECT FOR ALL BLUE BLOODSwarningRADAR SHOWING 100% CHANCE OF RIVAL SCHADENFREUDEwarningHOT TAKE VOLUME EXCEEDING SAFE LIMITS ACROSS THE SECwarningEMERGENCY BROADCAST SYSTEM: UNPRECEDENTED SALT LEVELS DETECTEDwarningCRITICAL COPIUM SHORTAGE REPORTED ACROSS THE FANBASE CORRIDORwarningCATEGORY 5 MELTDOWN ADVISORY IN EFFECT FOR ALL BLUE BLOODSwarningRADAR SHOWING 100% CHANCE OF RIVAL SCHADENFREUDEwarningHOT TAKE VOLUME EXCEEDING SAFE LIMITS ACROSS THE SEC
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91°
CAT 5🌪️ FULL SPIRALNEW RECORD HIGH

Lane Kiffin's ex-NFL roster experiment just won in court, the SEC is in full panic mode, and Kim Mulkey's women's team imploded over a geopolitical recruiting disaster—LSU is simultaneously genius and completely unhinged.

Chaos Score 🌪️91°
PANIC TEMP88
COPIUM LEVELS75
RIVAL PRESSURE92
DOOM INDEX78
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LAST 10 DAYS

SITUATION REPORT

LSU football just cracked open the entire NCAA rulebook by getting a court to greenlight ex-NFL players, turning Death Valley into the biggest rules violation ever attempted while rival ADs lose their minds and the college football world watches in furious awe. Meanwhile, Kim Mulkey's women's basketball team melted down spectacularly when a Ukrainian star walked out mid-season over a Russian recruit, dragging the SEC into lawsuits and federal judges into eligibility rulings. Baton Rouge is running the most chaotic dual-sport operation in college athletics right now—part innovation, part complete program implosion, all unhinged.

🔥 Lane Kiffin's ex-NFL roster experiment just won in court, the SEC is in full panic mode, and Kim Mulkey's women's team imploded over a geopolitical recruiting disaster—LSU is simultaneously genius and completely unhinged.

SALT MINES

SEPTEMBER 4, 2026

ALL MINES →
FAN FORUMPANIC TEMP

“I agree with him on all points, I don't believe these players(any of them, our team, any team) should be in college sports. this is the point everyone is making. LSU (and the other schools ) the sample size is tiny and no one is asking for anything outside of this 43 players , screwed by the NCAA to be eligible.”

↳ Rece Davis acknowledges NCAA’s absurd position on “pro” players

FAN FORUMPANIC TEMP

“So now that’s two of their biggest talking heads on Reece and Greenberg very clearly laying out how ridiculous this is when you get past all the fan emotion.”

↳ Rece Davis acknowledges NCAA’s absurd position on “pro” players

FAN FORUMPANIC TEMP

“the NCAA just say, “these are the rules. If you don’t like it, then don’t play” King of New Orleans Doesn’t seem hard. Have a spine. Say your rules. Tell anyone who thinks they can fight it just because they don’t like it to kick rocks. At some point, someone has to make concrete NIL rules or this shite will rinse and repeat year after year. First, the NCAA would need to construct and write rules that do not violate the various sections of the law. Secondly, the NCAA would need to construct and”

↳ re: Why can’t the NCAA just say, “these are the rules. If you don’t like it, then don’t play”

FAN FORUMDOOM INDEX

“the 'student-athlete' into a professional. Nobody likes it, except the players coming out of high school, their attorneys or the people who are the handlers facilitating everything, and the coaches who find willing boosters to pony up. But fans don't like it. I sure don't. Remember when a coach couldn't give a player a ride or buy a player a hamburger? Everyone was saying that players needed to get given a stipend, not millions of dollars. The NCAA fricked this up. The genie is out of the bottle”

↳ Rece Davis acknowledges NCAA’s absurd position on “pro” players

FAN FORUMPANIC TEMP

“First the hiring of Lane Kiffin You got the Daniel's #5 situation You get some journalist and SEC schools, circle jerking each other. Wanting to knock LSU out of the conference Now this court ruling , all before the first game of the year. I honestly cannot remember a more weird , interesting off season including the championship seasons. Anybody disagree?”

↳ Anybody else remember a more weird interesting LSU off-season news cycle??

FAN FORUMDOOM INDEX

“If they kicked us out, they would have to redo their media deals and would get less money than before so that would hurt them badly. There isn’t a replacement equal to us they can realistically get especially if they kicked us out over this. The big 12 and acc would both get new deals by having LSU as their marquee program.”

↳ Can people stop with LSU leaving the SEC